Divided Ground
Kids of divorce discuss lifestyle changes.
by Children's PressLine
TWEENS & TEENS News January 2008
Rachael Olfson, age 15
My parents are divorced. I knew that they
were getting separated when I was 7 years
old, and it was official when I was 9.
Since my parents split up, I have had to go
back and forth between my Mom’s house
and my Dad’s house every week. It’s
frustrating at times— I wanna just go
home to one house every day and not have to
worry about taking my stuff, bringing these
books here or those books there. I also feel
bad for kids who live mostly with their mothers,
because they only see their fathers every
so often. I guess it’s easier on a day-to-day
basis to go to one home, but it’s sad
over time to get attached to one parent over
another.
My Mom isn’t remarried, but my Dad is.
He got remarried when I was about 10 years
old. At first, I didn’t really know
my Step-Mom, but I’ve been living with
her for the past five years of my life. I
thought it would be awkward that she’s
not my real Mom. I wondered, “How should
I treat her or act around her?” Over
time, I realized she’s not my real Mom
and nobody can replace my real Mom, but my
Step-Mom has grown to be an important person
in my life and I trust and respect her.
Elizabeth Negron, age 14
My parents were already separated when my
father passed away— they were on their
way to being divorced. I was upset when my
Mom told me she and my Dad were splitting
up.
I feel weird when everyone is talking about
their dads. Like I didn’t go to the
father-daughter dance because my Dad is whatever…
and it’s just weird, talking about parents
in plural.
My Mom hasn’t gotten remarried or gone
on many dates. She always says she’s
going to bring home a new Dad, but she’s
just joking. If she did, I would just want
her to be happy. At the same time, in terms
of our living situation, we only have a two-bedroom
apartment. My Mom sleeps on the pullout couch.
If she got remarried, I doubt her husband
would want to sleep on the pullout couch.
I guess we’d have to move, which would
be a huge deal.
Shiann Pepin, age 8
My friend has divorced parents. He lives with
his Mom here in New York while his Dad lives
in Ecuador. His Dad does farming and his Mom
is a teacher. When my friend’s Dad comes
to New York, he offers to take my friend back
to Ecuador but his Mom doesn’t allow
it. My friend told me that he thought his
Mom was embarrassed by the way his father
dressed in New York.
My parents also are divorced, and they don’t
live together. They got divorced when I was
4 years old. Two parents can help one another,
but with one, it’s hard. My Mom has
to be my Mom, help my Grandma and be my Dad,
too.
I would feel happy if my Mom got remarried
because I don’t remember the feeling
of having a Dad.
Catherine Guzman, age 15
My parents got divorced before I was 1 year
old. I live with my Mom now. I see my Dad
usually every summer, as much as I can.
It never really bothers me when my friends
have both of their parents and I don’t.
When I was younger, there was this one time
when I was extremely upset. Kids were talking
about their parents and I felt left out.
When I was younger, I felt torn between wanting
to live with my Mom and wanting to live with
my Dad. At this point, I’m glad I live
with my Mom because I’m just so used
to living with her that I can’t imagine
not living with her. It’s not like I
don’t get frustrated with her, because
I do. Sometimes I feel like I want to go to
my Dad’s house, but not permanently.
I’d miss my Mom too much. When I was
little, I had to alternate between homes in
Pennsylvania. I’d see my Dad although
I didn’t really want to be there. Now
I talk to him and miss him.
My parents don’t get along, but it’s
not severe. When they used to get into fights
over the phone, it kind of freaked me out.
That occurred when I was younger. Now they
barely speak— I’m pretty used
to it. When my parents do talk, it’s
always about money. There’s no real
meaning to their conversations.
One of my Mom’s best friends separated
from her husband. They still live together
with their daughter, for the daughter’s
sake, because the daughter is highly attached
to both of her parents. Those parents can
cope with one another— that’s
the reason they can stay together like that.
Sundar Sampath, age 11
I have a friend whose Dad is divorced. One
day, I was going home with his Dad and him,
and we ran into his Mom on the way. My friend’s
parents don’t like one another, so they
got into a fight in the middle of the sidewalk
and it was really scary. People had to come
and break the fight up.
Children’s PressLine is a youth
journalism organization in Manhattan that
trains kids to be reporters and gives young
people the opportunity to represent themselves
in the media. For more information, visit
www.cplmedia.org.
